Category Archives: unemployment

“You had me at health insurance.”

So I lost my job last week. I knew it was coming and I had prepared myself for the inevitable. It still stung though when my boss pulled me into his office last Thursday morning and said, “Your position has been eliminated.”

It wasn’t anything personal. My job performance has been outstanding. It was a combination of print going the route of the Dodo bird and the Great Depression v. 2.0. I won’t really miss my job that much. What I will miss are the weekly paychecks, and ofcourse, the health insurance.

My recreational activities aren’t what some would call “safe.” I don’t scrap-book or knit doilies. I let girls hit me on rollerskates. I like to ride motorcycles. I do things that could hurt me, like, a lot.

Plus, I’m a bit of a hypochondriac. I’m always thinking that I have a face-eating tumor or some kind of parasite native to the Amazon rainforest or that I’m losing my hair. People like me don’t sleep easy at night without health insurance.

On the plus side, I have buckets of free time now. I’m job searching and writing and using time productively, but I can also have a little fun. I stayed out until 3 a.m. on a Wednesday last week. A Wednesday!

I guess what I’m trying to say here is if you get laid off or are already laid off, don’t take it personally. It sucks, but it’s not you. It’s totally them. And if you don’t have health insurance, start a book club. I hear Jane Austen is really hot right now. And zombies…