Fate, carpe diem, star-crossed lovers

romeo+julietYesterday, on my way back to the city from the ‘burbs, I stopped at a Wawa to get gas and food. As I was walking across the parking-lot towards the store’s front doors, I noticed a rather handsome man sitting on an idling motorcycle talking to some of the Wawa employees. 

I grabbed a drink, paid for my gas, and headed back to the car. The dude on the bike was still outside as I exited and gave me a long once-over as I walked past. I really thought nothing of it until I got in my car, turned on the ignition, and pulled back onto the highway.

Sometimes life offers us subtle gifts that we don’t detect until hindsight sets in. It had been a gorgeous day and I had hours upon hours of time that were all deliciously empty. I should have asked the guy to give me a ride on his bike or at least struck up a conversation. Who knows. He might have been my soul mate. 

Most people try to go through life staying  just below the radar, going quietly and undetected through the motions until they die. The luckier ones have a “Oh, f*ck it” attitude and live unapologetically and by their own agenda. They suck every last inch of the world dry and don’t believe in regrets.

“If only” are the two most painful words in the English language. All of the shoulda, woulda, coulda’s that dance through your head at night are dangerous little beasts. I am trying to cultivate a life for myself that excludes those three words. I do not want to be some sad, sagging woman sitting alone at a bar on a Tuesday telling anybody who will listen all of the great things she could have done. 

I am still trying to figure out if life has a predestined path for all of us or if we forge our own way. And if it is predestined, what happens if we veer off course? What if we click instead of clack and end up meeting and marrying the wrong man or moving to the wrong city or working the wrong career? And what if we aren’t even aware of it?

Does life eventually introduce us to our soulmate? Does it throw them in front of us, like a dog dropping a ball at our feet? 

It’s funny to think how much effort went into me seeing the guy on the motorcycle this past weekend. It took amebas turning into fish turning into terrestrials, a thousand sailing ships, ten thousand civilizations, hundred upon hundreds of war, inventions,  and millions of first kisses from all of our mothers and fathers to lead up to that one perhaps trivial moment. And for what? Ten dollars worth of gas and a  glance from a stranger? 

If you think about it, we need to be more careful with our choices. Every moment, every action, is sacred. This day, this minute, is sacred. Start treating it as such.

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