I think it is essential, absolutely essential to have a tribe of people to call your own within this urban jungle. Cities tend to be very lonely places without friends. I mean, I’m not commanding you to meet your bff’s for coffee every single day at some kind of Cental Perk-esque cafe, just let them know that they mean the world to you every once in awhile.
I was having a conversation with my mother the other day about relationships. I felt like I had been ditched by some of my friends last week and I was heartbroken. Somehow on television people have a built-in, tight-knit circle of friends whose loyalties are a given and and whose affections never change. I’ve noticed that, in my own life and the immediate satellite lives that orbit mine, this is hardly the case. There seems like there is more of a revolving door of people in and out of my life. We somehow find each other, hang out, have a few drinks, and then eventually we all drift off into our own separate lives. It’s like we’re in a giant pinball machine with lots of balls and lots of places to bounce off of and to. The changing cast makes you grateful for the people from Before, and ofcourse family, the rock whose shadow changes only very, very slowly.
I think we are all just trying to figure stuff out still. It seems like we are all walking around with big chunks of ourselves missing and all of these incomplete people seek one another out for support or to be drinking buddies or to just forget about what our lives have culiminated to.
I was out every night this past Memorial Day weekend with different people. There were barbeques, first dates, brunches with girlfriends, long distance phone calls, and pitcher after pitcher of cheap beer ordered. There were plans made that both parties knew they wouldn’t follow through with, closure, long, silent walks home after last call, and discussions of whether two days was an appropriate length of time to call after a first date. It was a breezy, beautiful time this weekend and it reminded me to be so, so thankful for these people I have in my life. Yes, they are all not perfect. Some are flaky, others are unemployed and bad drunks, but they are all mine. They are my tribe, the people I can count on to be there, the people who make this city bearable.